Please Don't Fall For Me
by xTribalhart
Summary: Roxas is a victim to cancer. He struggles through each day with the thought of dying the next. While everyone lives a happy life, he sufers through misery and misery. He lives through each day with a fake smile.  Full summary and parings inside.
1. Insomnia

**Okay, so this is my first fanfic. I've had this idea running in my head for awhile and thought, "Hey, why not?" So yeah. I've taken inspiration from many other stories, I sure hope I'm not taking anything from anyone ^^U Please be nice, or at least try to. You can point out my mistakes if you'd like, we all learn from mistakes don't we? If you have any questions, please do ask away, send me a message anytime! Sorry if this is short..**

**Disclaimer: Really? If I owned Kingdom Hearts and any of it's characters, would I be sitting here writing fanfiction? Of course not! I'd be making some huge changes to the game! (heart)**

Full summary: Roxas is a victim of cancer. He struggles through each day with the thought of dying the next. While everyone lives a wonderful life, he suffers through misery, heart break and much more. With a fake smile on his face, he gets through each day. But the one day he spills all his bottled up feelings and is in tears, that is the day he is walked in on by his twin's boyfriend, Riku. In an effort to console him, he stays with Roxas as he spills all of what's going on to him finally, leaving out the part about his affection for him. Since then, the two become very close, Riku being very protective of him. Roxas begins to slowly and helplessly fall for the silverette once more, but he wasn't the only one this time. With past lovers, current drama and Roxas' time to live, they will get through it all, somehow.

**Parings: Riku/Roxas (main), Vani/Ven (later), Axel/Sora (later)**

**Vani/Roku (past and one-sided), Riku/Sora (beginning and soon past)**

* * *

**Chapter One: **Insomnia

The strum of guitars began and the blond began to stir. It was followed by a meek voice, the voice of a girl singing softly. Music. The light guitar he knows so well.

_I feel so stupid because I'm in love with yo-_

He picks up the device and flips it open, pressing it against his ear, giving a groggy hello.

_"Wake up, Chibi. We have to go, you promised to help me."_

Azure eyes shot wide open. How could he have forgotten? He stumbled a little but non-the-less bolted up from his bed. He could hear the chuckle on the other side of the phone. That sent a shiver up his spine.

"Not funny Riku..." He pouted and he literally could feel that grin plastered on the silverette's face, followed by another chuckle. A light pink stained his cheeks. God, the things this man did to him..

_"Well, what are you waiting for? Get ready! I'll be there in a few, Sor will keep me busy while you finish, ja ne~." _And a 'click!' The youth set his phone down on his bed next to him, his hands immediately going to touch his reddend cheeks. Damnit.. He shook it off and stood up, making his way to the bathroom to shower and freshen up.

* * *

Roxas gave a content sigh when he stepped out. That was a well needed shower. The blond walked happily back into his room and making a beeline towards his closet. He pulled out a red plaid shirt with a black undershirt, a pair of ripped grey skin tight jeans and his worn out black and white checkered vans with some rainbow socks. The youth got dressed quickly. He looked at himself in the mirror and smiled, deciding he looked good enough and fixed his unkempt golden spikes a bit. With one last look, he turned to grab his phone and checkered messenger bag, but, before he headed out the door, he spotted the calender near his mirror, and looked at today's date. _December 6th, appointment 5:45 pm. _He pulled out his phone and made an event to remind himself later. _'Hmn.. better tell So.' _With that, he headed out the door to the stairs, a smile still on his face. He was excited to see Riku this morning, and to spend alone time with him, even if it was just to help him with a gift for Sora. But all that shattered when he stepped foot into the living room. His brother was straddling said silverette, the two in a heated make-out session. Roxas felt his heart drop but he was forced to shake it off, putting on his usual annoyed expression.

"Get a room." He mumbled in fake irritation as he walked into the kitchen. As much as it hurt so much and his heart broke , he knew he had to keep his composure. After all, Sora saw him first, right? _As if. _Roxas sat down in the seat his brother put his breakfast in front of and began to idly chew on the food, something to fill the empty pit in his stomach. He was alone now, so he let his mind wander. He thought it was unfair how Sora could have happiness while he had to suffer. He saw Riku first, Sora knew very well Roxas was madly in love with the silverette, but he went and stole him either way. And when he thought he found happiness, his ex-boyfriend had to go and dump him for unknown reasons. On top of that, he's been feeling extremely sick, he was lucky to be at least okay today, thank god they were gonna get results today. His train of thought was cut when he felt a hand at his shoulder, causing him to jump up, stumble and fall back into the body of the one who caught him off guard. He heard a chuckle and he shivered. Of course it had to be Riku. His cheeks flushed a pretty pink as he averted his eyes away from the older man. Another chuckle and the blond could swear he was about to melt if he kept this up.

"C'mon Roxy, we gotta go." With that, Riku turned to leave. He shook it off once more and grabbed his messenger bag, looking at his phone. It was 11:45 am. The blond stuffed his phone in his pocket and walked to the door, grabbing his black coat and slipping it on, he swung his messenger bag over his shoulder and looked up to come face to face with some more heartache. His brunette twin was leaning up to his boyfriend, giving him a loving good-bye kiss, smiles and all. That should be him. That should be Roxas. The golden haired boy turned away, that dull heartache still present. Once more, hands were set on his shoulders and this time, he looked back to meet aquamarine optics and a smile. It lingered with sympathy. He hated that. Roxas turned back around and opened the door and moved so Riku could come out first. The blond turned to his brother with a his masked feelings back in place. "Sor, I have the appointment at 5:45, be sure to be ready half an hour early, I'll make sure Ri drops me off beforehand, stay safe." With a small smile, he waved and turned, walking towards Riku's car and getting in.

* * *

The car ride to the mall was spent in silence. It consisted of Riku keeping his concentration on the road and flipping off other drivers for being assholes and Roxas gazing out the windows mindlessly. Once they made it, Riku took Roxas to his favourite little cafe, Heartless. They took a small booth near the window and Riku went to get their drinks. Tch. This was out of pure sympathy and he knew it. Roxas already ate at home, but since Riku was offering, why not? Roxas sat there, letting himself get lost in his many thoughts running through his head. So much to think about, he was best at it. That's the only place he could sort out his emotions. A small string of tunes cut that short, that one other song he knew so, so well..

_"Is it still me that makes you sweat? Am I who you think about in bed? When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as your sliding off your dress?"_

Those lyrics made his heart race and he froze up.

_"I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better __**fuck**__-"_

He flipped his phone open and pressed it against his ear. Nothing came out of his mouth, he couldn't say a thing no matter how much he tried. But he didn't have to wait long, he could **feel **that smug smirk on the other line and then came that bittersweet voice that was laced with lust,

_'Roxy? Miss me baby?'_


	2. Stereo Love

**One review is enough to keep me going (: I just want to finish up the story. With the idea and such lingering in my head. Since I now have much more time, I think I should add another chapter, no? **

**Thanks to my only reviewer, the one under YourOnlyFriend. This made me smile and gave me more confindence going on (heart)**

**Disclaimer: Really? If I owned Kingdom Hearts and any of it's characters, would I be sitting here writing fanfiction? Of course not! I'd be making some huge changes to the game! (heart)**

* * *

**Chapter Two: **Stereo Love

His voice was caught in his throat. He felt like he couldn't breathe. The tears were starting to come in, all the pain coming back. He was speechless. His whole body felt like it was frozen. And he could feel that sinister smirk on the other end of the line. The black haired boy knew he had such effect towards the blonde, he found sick pleasure in breaking the boy. A small chuckle that dripped in venom and he spoke up,

_'What's wrong? Don't you miss me, Roxy? How mean, I sure missed __**you**__.'_

The sarcasm in that statement was obvious. It made Roxas more anxious. Why? Why did this have to happen right now, out of all places? He still couldn't muster up his voice, his breathe still caught in his throat. Then he suddenly felt his phone snatched from him and put up to a certain silverette's ear, who clearly had an annoyed expression. Riku put the drinks down and scowled through the speaker.

"What the hell do you want?"

_'Aw, you're not blondie. You sound more like that prude silver haired brat.'_

"Leave Roxas alone you cold hearted bastard."

_'Put him back on, I wasn't finished.'_

"I see your face anywhere near Rox, I will break it, **Vanitas**."

And with a 'Click!', he hung up. The silverette gave a small harsh glare towards the blonde, who looked down in shame. Roxas meekly sipped at his espresso, keeping his gaze averted from the older. The two stayed silent for a few minutes and he could feel tension rising.

"Why did you answer?" Riku asked firmly, sipping at his own black coffee. More silence. Honestly, he didn't have an answer for it. He knew very well who it was too, it was kind of an instinct to pick it up. He didn't mean to, he was just... He just wasn't thinking. But he refused to answer him. As if he could sense his thoughts, the older one relaxed and gave him another sympathetic look.

"I'm sorry.. I.. Just the thought of him and what he did to you makes my blood boil.. I didn't mean to throw my anger at you.." He spoke barely above a whisper. Roxas gave a small nod and flashed another of his fake smiles. The boy reached for his phone across the table and checked them time. 2:13 pm. They should get going. And once, as if Riku was a mind reader, he too suggested that they'd get going. While the older downed the rest of his not so hot black coffee, Roxas took a few tiny sips of his espresso he barely consumed and threw it out. They both got up and began to venture many stores.

* * *

Right now, Riku was on line in a store called 'The World That Never Was', purchasing his lover's gift. Instead of waiting with him, the youth decided to roam around to see if he wanted something. It was his birthday in about a week, might as well spoil himself. The blond gazed at the many t-shirts, pants and skirts around him. What to choose.. Maybe an outfit for the special day? He and Sora were going to turn sixteen on the 13th. Something nice. That's when he spotted a skirt. A pretty, grey pleated skirt. It was just above the knees and showed off a bit of his thighs. It was perfect. He was so tempted to buy it. So he took it. He chirped happily down the store, now in search of his little brother's present. That's when he encountered a panda sweater. One that had ears on the hood. Sora's gonna freak when he sees this. The brunette's such a girl for pandas. He happily snatched it off the rack and skipped towards the line. Once the two were done paying, they made sure that's all they needed before they left the mall.

The two jumped into the car in silence, Roxas messing with the radio stations. When he finally found a decent enough song, he leaned back in his seat and relaxed. It was the ending for Teenage Dream, better than whatever else was playing. The youth idly looked out the window when the song changed. It started with a chill beat and the humming of a woman. And then words that lingered in his ears.

_When you're gonna stop breaking my heart  
I don't wanna be another one  
Paying for the things I never done  
Don't let go...  
Don't let go...  
To my love_

Roxas began tapping to the beat, the song captivating him. It explained so much of how he felt. How could one simple song do that?

_I hate to see you cry,  
Your smile is a beautiful lie.  
I hate to see you cry,  
My love is dying inside._

Soon enough the youth began to sing along with it with much passion in his countertenor voice. This song made the boy want to get up and dance, but that was prevented since he was still in a car. He could feel the silverette's amused gaze on him at certain points.

_Can I get to your soul?  
Can you get to my thoughts?  
Can you promise we won't let go?  
All the things that I need,  
All the things that you need,  
You can make it feel so real._

This song was so perfect, it explained his current feelings, in such a chill dance rhythm. He had to find the name of this song soon.

_Oh, baby, I'll try to make the things right  
I need you more than air, when I'm not with you  
Please, don't ask me why, just kiss me this time  
My only dream is about you and I. _

And that's when the song ended. By that time, they were already home and then blond was pulled out of his trance instantly. Such a passionate song. Azure optics glanced at the older one, only to see the same amused expression. Roxas turned away with flushed cheeks and avoided his gaze for the remaining walk to the door. As soon as he entered the door to his house, he felt his head throb. Everything began to get dizzy and blurry. Damnit.. He tried not to make it that noticeable, but failed miserably when he stumbled towards the couch. '_All I need is rest.. Forgot that I couldn't... work myself to much.. You're.. f-fine Rox..' _He told himself when Sora and Riku came rushing to his side. He felt his stomach churn, the nausea coming in. A whole pain went throughout his body as well and he felt like he was going to die that moment.

_'You're fine Roxas... J-just.. lay down... take a r-rest..'_ He continued to falsely reassure himself. He felt his whole world began to grow black.

_'Everything's gonna be alright.'_


	3. Through the Glass

**So here comes another chapter~. I would like to thank you all for the alerts and the lone review from le parfait samurai. (hearts) They provoked me to write this chapter today c: **

**Anyways, I will be starting a new story soon. Maybe I'll work on it after this. Just a heads up. But don't worry PDFFM will still definitely go on of course. **

**Disclaimer: Really? If I owned Kingdom Hearts and any of it's characters, would I be sitting here writing fanfiction? Of course not! I'd be making some huge changes to the game! (heart)**

* * *

**Chapter Three: **Through the Glass

_'Wake up.'_

He heard a voice, one of a boy. It sounded familiar. He slowly opened his azure hues, getting his vision to focus at his surroundings. He was inside what looked like a castle. Was this real?

_'Good. Follow the music little one.'_

Just as that was said, he heard the sound of a violin. It played such a beautiful, yet sad melody. The youth stood in awe for a moment. He began to wonder who was playing it. The blond turn towards the direction of where the music was coming from, only to be faced with a spiral staircase.

_'Go on.'_

Roxas did as the voice ordered and began to climb the steps. The more he climbed, the closer it got. But this staircase seemed never ending. None-the-less, he continued, determained to find the who was playing such a gorgeous piece of music. What was minutes felt like hours to the boy, but he was lucky to find relief once he reached the end of the steps. He was now in a octagon shaped room, which consisted of pots and a few things scattered around the floor. This confused him, until he noticed the door to the left of the room. It was a crack open and he could hear the wonderful sound seep from it and he smiled lightly. Roxas reluctantly walked towards the door and opened it just a tad, taking a peak. But he could see nothing. So he took a deep breath, and walked in. He was suprised to find that there was no one inside the room, but the music was still playing. He looked around to see if it was a record or something. No sign of one. Across the room he noticed a mirror. Again, he reluctantly walked towards it and the music got louder. He stopped once he was directly in front of the mirror, only to be taken back by his attire. His blond hair was still in the form of his side swept spikes, but he had a long pony tail on his shoulder, which was in the form of a french braid. He wore a white cravat that adorens his burgandy victorian coat with ruffled cuffs, it reached up to upper thighs. He also wore a brown belt over the clothing and around his waist loosely, which held a shealth blade at his left hip. For the lower half, he wore a pair of black trousers and finished it off with knee-high brown boats, ones that they wore in the medieval era.

'Is... this real..?' He asked himself as he touched his own reflection.

_'Why wouldn't it be?'_

He looked up to find his own reflection talking back to him. While he wore a questioning expression, his reflection wore a smile.

_'Are you ready?'_

And the reflection changed before his eyes, into that of a girl. She wore blond hair as bright as his, it cascaded down her shoulders and back, reaching her waist. She had the same azure eyes as his own, same face, just a bit more feminine. For clothing, she wore a long black and light turquoise dress, the torso being of the dark ebony and the skirt being the turquoise. The torso had beautiful turquoise ruffles at the top. Her sleeves were puffed and fell from her shoulders, in the same ebony adorned with the same ruffles. She wore long fingerless elegant gloves, the ones that were held down by hooking on the middle finger, in the same turquoise. A beautiful rose adorned her locks, that beautiful turquoise colour. The middle of her chest area held a ruby red jewel surrounded by gold lining and her foot wear were a pair of steel pointed toe boots, one that looked like what soldiers wore with armor. That smile never left face.

_'Do you know why you're here?'_

The voice was still the same. His eyes unintentionally trailed down to her chest. Nothing. That's when he realized she was a boy. But why in a dress? This all confused him.

_'I guess not. It was bound to happen, but it happened a little to late in your life.'_

What? What was this person talking about? Roxas felt fine. There was nothing wrong with him.

_'We can end this now, no more pain to go through. I don't think you'll like what you are about to find out.'_

Roxas tried to speak. He was so confused. He wanted to question the mysterious boy. Who are you? Why am I here? Where are we? What are you talking about? How did I end up here? When did I change into these clothes? So much ran through his head, but his voice was caught in his throat.

_'So, are you ready?'_

'No.' He finally spoke up unintentionally. It's like someone spoke for him instead, it just came out.

_'I see. Wake up, Roxas. Everyone's waiting.'_

* * *

His ocean blue eyes shot open and he sat up startled. He put a hand to his head. It was throbbing and it hurt like hell. He wiped his brow, he was sweating like crazy and he felt like crap. His gaze was down at his lap, bed sheets. But they weren't his. He finally looked up and he realized he was in a hospital room, that explains the foul smell and the hospital gown he was wearing. Roxas cringed. He hated hospitals. Dreaded them. He decided to lay back down to help calm himself. This was no time to get worked up. The boy looked to his right and came face to face with a big window. It was dark. How long have they been here? Where was Sora and Riku? His train of thought was cut when he heard footsteps. His head immediately snapped to his left, which wasn't such a smart idea. He heard a small chuckle while he held his head in pain. This irritated the blond, but before he could remark, the person spoke up.

"Glad to see you're doing fine, Roxas. Sora and Riku were worried to death." So it was the doctor. His hair was a slate blue, swept to one side of his face in an emoish hair style. He was pale and had blue eyes, a shade lighter than his own. But Roxas could feel the uneasiness in his voice. There was something up. It's like... that dream he had...

_**'We can end this now, no more pain to go through. I don't think you'll like what you are about to find out.'**_

That line rang through his head. Was it.. true..? The doctor spoke up again.

"Riku and Sora are in the lobby, They'll be coming after I'm finished with you." The young man spoke as he sorted out paper on a desk and jotted down little notes. His back was still turned to him.

"I need x-rays still Roxas, you don't mind coming with me?"

The blond nodded and sat up slowly, his body aching.

"Take your time, no rush." He smiled at the blond.

Once he was able to get out of bed, he followed the doctor into a different room.

"Lay back and relax, it won't take long."

* * *

Just like the man promised, it didn't take much. He was happy for that. The blond was led back to his room by a nurse with beautiful brunette locks, that formed a french braid down her back. Her eyes were a beautiful emerald. She looked.. motherly. It made Roxas feel warm inside. The woman smiled at him and helped him into the bed.

"I'll let Sora and Riku know they can now come in, I'll be right back." And she left with a smile on her face. Now all Roxas had to do was wait for the results, they've already taken blood from him telling by cotton pad tapped around his arm.

'I wonder what's wrong with me...' He thought to himself. Hopefully it wouldn't be as bad as he thinks. This made him anxious for results. He heard foot steps again.

"R-Roxas..!" Sora cried as he ran into the room, but was stopped short by the silverette trailing behind.

"Idiot, do you want to kill Roxas?" He scolded his boyfriend and Sora hung his head in shame. Riku let go of Sora and he smiled up at the blond.

"Feeling better, Roxy?"

The boy felt his face flush and looked down at his lap, refusing to meet the older's gaze.

"Y-yeah.. Just a bit sore though.." He meekly answered.

"I was so worried Roxas! Don't ever scare me like that again!" He heard his brother cry. It was obvious the brunette had been in tears for probably hours, he could see more form at the corner of those big blue eyes. Roxas smiled sadly. He didn't mean to make his brother worry so much. The youth held his arms out and the brunette ran into them, holding his older twin tightly. He winced a bit, but none-the-less held him back just as tight.

"I'm sorry, Sor. I didn't mean to worry you so much.. I'm okay now, please don't cry."

Roxas pulled away a few inches from the embrace so he was now face to face with the younger sibling. He gave his twin a sad smile and wiped away the tears leaking down his flushed face. Sora hiccuped and shut his eyes, giving a small sob. The blond pulled him closer and kissed the top of his head lovingly.

"I promise to never scare you like that again, Sora. Don't cry anymore, it makes me feel horrible seeing you cry. I'm fine right now, that's all that matters, right?" He whispered and Sora nodded, leaning to rest his head on Roxas'shoulder. He smiled and held him close. His azure optics moved to look at the silverette standing and looking at the scene with a warm smile. That was once more cut short when they heard foot steps. It was the doctor. He looked... uneasy.. This gave me a bad feeling..

"I have the results. Riku, may I ask you to leave for a moment, I need a word with Roxas and Sora."

The older boy nodded and left the room. The man turned to the twins, with a sympathetic smile.

"I never got to properly introduce myself. My name is Doctor Ienzo, he held his hand out to both of them and they took it in a small handshake. Dr. Ienzo moved to his desk and put his papers he had in his hands and jotting down more. After a moment, he turned back around to them siblings.

"As you know, we took x-rays and blood tests and such. It was too late to do anything about for it has already started spreading throughout your body."

What..? What was he talking about..? I felt my mouth go dry and my heart began to race. This wasn't gonna be good..

"Roxas.. I'm afraid.." He started but trailed off.

_'What the hell do I have! Hurry up!'_

"Roxas, I'm afraid you have cancer."


End file.
